An Anniversary Like No Other

From a poem by W.S. Merwin … “Every year without knowing it, I have passed the day when the last fires will wave to me. And the silence will set out, tireless traveler, like the beam of a lightless star.”

The poem is called “On the Anniversary of my Death” and was written by our current U.S. Poet Laureate, who writes prolifically from Hawaii. Twice a Pulitzer Prize winner. Known for his praise of the natural world. Author and poet of 30 books. Impressive man.

I have read this poem in years past and saw it recently, reminding me that I have always been moved by this concept. We celebrate most birthdays and anniversaries as joyous occasions, but the anniversary of someone’s death has a sad pallor that is too hard to shake. I see it in people I know … they cannot get past the day or the hour, the memory of that day. I understand a little of what they feel. I understand a little of the sadness, knowing that I have not lost a child or a spouse or a sibling … and so I have not lived that dreadful sting.

That said, for me death is different. My dad died very young and perhaps because I saw death early, it has helped me think about it differently. I may never know why but for me the day of someone’s passing is a happy day, not dark in any way. On my mother’s death anniversary, I post a picture and a warm story about her … I send my two siblings an upbeat message of great memories … I look for the positive things I remember about her throughout the day. It is a really great day and I am happy for both of us, she above all.

The poem’s message makes me think too of Jim Valvano and his famous speech at the ESPY Awards … he described a great day as one with laughter, tears and thought. Great words to remember, and his energy in that speech has always stayed with me. He knew he was dying … he needed physical help up and down the stairs to the podium … he could see his death anniversary day coming. Yet he smiled and joked and laughed … and taught me a lot.

As we prepare to celebrate the death and resurrection of Jesus, think about your life and every day that passes by. One of those will be mine and one will be yours, and I pray that those who knew us best have much to laugh, cry and think about.