The Future is Coming

Seen on a Facebook post from Fr. Don McMillan at Boston College ... from Anthony Demelo, a fellow Jesuit: "Extend your arms in welcome to the future. The best is yet to come."

As we depart another year, I pray that we be wise enough to look at the future with wonder and welcome, and leave fear and doubt for the past.  Our lives are propelled forward by faith, in ourselves and in God’s plan. And in fact we can safely say, as true believers, that the best is definitely yet to come.

It may not come without travail or challenge, or persecution for some. It may not come easily or when bidden or expected. But that is the very essence of faith, the belief that the best is before us and in God’s hands, no matter the circumstances. It is He who determines when our best will arrive. And it is on its way.

A Humble Man

This weekend at Mass I learned something I didn’t know about Joseph, that he actually considered “divorcing” himself quietly from Mary, when she became pregnant with their coming Son. Divorcing is an odd word in this context, since they had not been living together … but the key for me was in Joseph’s reaction. As a humble and righteous man, he wanted to do the right thing in his mind, but the angel of God told him that the right thing was not following his mind, but in following God’s will. And so he did, for the rest of his days.

Isn’t that true for all of us? We think we have a plan for our lives but that plan changes over and over again. We can’t predict what will happen day to day … we don’t know what we’ll be doing month to month … we won’t know where we’ll be year to year. Isn’t that proof enough that our lives follow God’s plan, and not ours?

I pray today that I can live Joseph’s humble example, that I can see my life for what it is … a reflection of God’s will for me, a path that does justice to Him, a means to a an ultimate end with Him. It is not easy to give yourself to God’s will; it’s just not our nature to relinquish control. But we need to know that He is in control, working through us. I see that in people I respect, as they live their lives of love and care for others … 

Celebrating for Real

From the Oprah newsletter … "Christmas can't be found on a tree or in a package. It comes with the rich connections we make with those around us and with the nurturing we extend to ourselves and others … those are the gifts that count.”

My sister sent this to me, as she shared that in her recent move into a new place, all of her Christmas decorations ended up at the back of a storage unit. Which means that for the first time in her life, she will not have a tree or decorations. But instead she said “I will however be celebrating the REAL meaning of Christmas, the Promise that came with HIS birth. Awesome!!!”

Today I pray for all of us who may not have much in the way of decorations up, but who have Christ in our hearts. It is our connection to Him that helps us nurture others. It is our connection to Him that helps us nurture ourselves, too. I am proud of my sister for her attitude, her perseverance and her belief. Because it is that belief in Him … and in Christmas … that makes this season so joyously powerful.

Tomorrow is Not Like Today

I was catching up on emails and saw this thoughtful and unexpected story from TGIF, Today God Is First … a reminder that there is always more than meets the eye, more than we can know at the present moment. God has a plan for me and for us, and it is unfathomable. I pray today that I be able to take the time to consider the many factors that go into any human situation. I pray too that I am able to recognize the challenges that others face … and to help them see that tomorrow will be different than today. Always there is hope, even in the humblest and most difficult of circumstances. I have seen that in my own life.

The brother in humble circumstances ought to take pride in his high position. – James 1:9

Do you find yourself in humble circumstances? If so, James tells us that we are to take pride in this “high” position. These two things would seem to be an oxymoron. Most of us would not consider humble circumstances a high position.Successful business tells us that being on top means being wealthy, attaining favor and status, or having power to influence. However, Jesus influenced not from power, but from weakness.

J.C. Penney is a name synonymous with department store. He first launched his chain of “The Golden Rule” stores in 1907. In 1910 his first wife died. Three years later, he incorporated as the J.C. Penney Company. In 1923 his second wife died giving birth to his son. In 1929 the stock market crashed and he lost $40 million.

By 1932, he had to sell out to satisfy creditors. This left him virtually broke.

Crushed in spirit from his loss and his health suddenly failing, Penney wound up in a Battle Creek, Michigan sanitarium. One morning he heard the distant singing of employees who gathered to start the day with God: Be not dismayed, whate’er betide, God will take care of you …. Penney followed the music to its source and slipped into a back row. He left a short time later a changed man, his health and spirit renewed, and ready to start the long climb back at age fifty-six.

By 1951 there was a J.C. Penney store in every state, and for the first time sales surpassed $1 billion a year.

The success of J.C. Penney can be traced to God’s mercy in his life to bring him out of his humble circumstance. Do you find yourself in a humble circumstance? God is the only one who can help you see your humble circumstance from His viewpoint - a high position. It is a high position because of what God is going to teach you in this place. He does not intend you to stay there; it is merely a stopping place to learn some important things you would not learn otherwise. Press into God and trust Him for the outcome to your circumstances.

In the End, Content is Everything

From Seth Godin’s blog … “You will never keep people from talking. But you can take actions to influence the content of what they say.”

Seth is a very savvy guy, a clever and provocative business thinker and writer. If you haven’t seen any of his work (and you’re in business), he is a very worthwhile read. And what he says is honest and true. Often what he says has application far beyond business, so you may want to read him even if you're not in business..

I read this line in one of his blog postings and thought about it outside of the business world, in the context of truly personal character. It makes me consider what actions we take to “influence” what people say … or more importantly, think … about us.

It’s not the same as “wondering what people think”, in the way some are at times overly concerned with what others perceive. That seems passive to me. Seth’s approach is more active … what are we doing that shapes the perception or reality that people have of us? Do we think about that consciously? Do we think about it more when we’re young and starting our careers, and beginning to shape our destiny? How about as we age … maybe we think about it even more then, closer to the end times?

I think about that sentence another way, for a time when people will definitely be talking about you. What will people remember you for, when you’re gone? After all, it is the whole of your life that will be celebrated, or not. What will people think when they hear your name? What would they say if asked to speak at your memorial? What “content” are you giving them that is truly yours, honest and direct and at the core of who you are? What actions of yours will influence their final opinion?

We play many roles and take many actions, every minute of every day. And it is a precious few actions that may resonate for people in a special way. I pray today that I … and all of those I touch … am taking and displaying actions that reveal the true me, the me I want them to remember, the soul within.

The Coming of Special Guests

Father Mark’s homily at Annunciation last Sunday reminded us that Advent is a time to “clean out the house that is your soul” … there is a special guest about to arrive, and this is the perfect time to acknowledge our sins, reflect on our purpose and prepare to receive the gift that is Christ in Christmas.

I saw this related item in Sacred Space … “Advent is in many ways the most beautiful and profound time of the Christian year. Advent means ‘coming’, and the season is about our waiting for the most mysterious and wonderful coming of all, into the heart of our lives. The words of St Paul are relevant: “It is full time now for you to wake from sleep. For salvation is nearer to us now than when we first believed; the night is far gone, the day is at hand. Let us then cast off the works of darkness and put on the armor of light.”

As I near the holidays and a return to our once-a-year full family gathering, I realize again that at Advent we all experience the coming of special guests in lots of different ways. Many are family, like my daughter traveling back from Argentina, kids coming home from college, distanced relatives joining some of us for the holidays. Some are old friends, like the members of my Men's Group in Greensboro I hope to see over the coming weeks ... some are new friends, like the small group of us who come together on Mondays for faith sharing. And then there are the people who unexpectedly come into our lives and thoughts, and show us God ... the homeless man under the bridge one of our members brought breakfast to, the deaf woman whose home we painted last weekend for Habitat, the service veterans who gave the ultimate sacrifice for us on December 7th, 1941. All are special guests, in our homes and in our hearts.

We come together for these holidays, woven together by tradition and memory and love. Our joy is more palpable in emotion and song and prayer. The "day" is at hand and salvation definitely feels nearer than ever. And there is but one reason why. 

At the core of the season is Jesus, He who was the greatest guest, He who comes to us in scripture and hymn every year at this time, more clearly than at other times. And He who will be the greatest guest again, one day when we are least expecting Him. As we get closer to the holidays we will enjoy together, I pray that we may allow Jesus to come into our hearts this season as an expected guest, one whose company we treasure. He is indeed the Gift, to all of us.

Rest in Peace

Elizabeth Edwards passed away today but will not be forgotten. To me she was a person of faith, a person of strength, a person of courage that I looked at with wonder. Intelligent, loyal, family-focused ... she knew her strengths and her weaknesses, and displayed them publicly. She was rare, no matter your politics. She was not perfect, not by any means. But she taught me a lot about how to die ... that too is rare to find.

For Elizabeth

Today I pray for Elizabeth Edwards, a fellow North Carolinian who has been a model of integrity, truth and courage for many years. She lies at home today, surrounded by her loved ones, preparing to die. I know she has planned carefully for this day. Still though, it is sad to see someone so valuable too soon leave the scene. Her decency and tremendous instinct for the human condition will live on, as it does in her statement today ...

"You all know that I have been sustained throughout my life by three saving graces – my family, my friends and a faith in the power of resilience and hope. These graces have carried me through difficult times and they have brought more joy to the good times than I ever could have imagined. The days of our lives, for all of us, are numbered. We know that. And, yes, there are certainly times when we aren't able to muster as much strength and patience as we would like. It's called being human.

"But I have found that in the simple act of living with hope, and in the daily effort to have a positive impact in the world, the days I do have are made all the more meaningful and precious. And for that I am grateful. It isn't possible to put into words the love and gratitude I feel to everyone who has and continues to support and inspire me every day. To you I simply say: you know."

A Brush of Kindness

This Saturday I had a chance to join fellow parishioners at "A Brush of Kindness", an opportunity to paint a Habitat for Humanity home in Sanford. We were able to finish both the inside and outside painting of a whole house, with the help of over a dozen volunteers. It was my first chance to work with Annunciation folks, a gratifying way to share our time and (painting) talent with Linda, the deaf woman who owns the house and will move in soon.

Reflecting on the day this Sunday morning, it made me think of the many different ways we share "brushes of kindness" with people. I say brushes because so many of them go almost unnoticed ... they are like very small opportunities that come our way. Maybe a smile for someone, holding an open door or letting cars into our driving lane. Maybe sharing a meal or a recipe, or sharing time with a friend that needs us. Maybe delivering items for our Be An Angel effort at church, or sending a kind email to a coworker or making a call to a family member out of town. Today at early Mass one of our small group members brushed me with kindness when she told me she had made a recipe I shared for her circle ... that made me feel warm, seeing her great smile and enthusiasm. And it was literally a conversation that took seconds.

I pray today that each of us that share brushes of .kindness will know just how much those mean to the people who receive them, whether they are structured and planned, or spontaneous. Just in our own small group, I think of Jenny working at Hospice, Shay ministering to the sick, Mary so involved at church, Marty leading the Habitat effort ... and I know there are so many other activities that all of our members are likely involved in. We each have so many opportunities ... may we take advantage of them more and more, and especially those that seem small and unexpected. May we be a "brush of kindness" to someone today, and every day.

His Investment ... and Mine

I saw this quote at the office today, in one of our network marketing books … “My father taught me to always do more than you get paid for, as an investment in your future.” 

What a great idea to carry with you, no matter what you do. The quote is from Jim Rohn, a fairly famous motivational speaker in our industry and recently deceased. He has been oft-quoted for as long as I’ve been involved with my company, going back about 10 years. And his words really are inspirational, in lots of ways.

Now look at the quote in another context. God the Father asked Jesus to do so much more than was expected, to make the ultimate investment … and all for our future. He asked Jesus to give his life for us. Jesus invested Himself not only in his suffering but He invested in us. Jesus lives within us as proof of His investment … He lends us each His emotional energy, because we too are invested in Him..

I pray today that I too can always do more than God expects of me, as an investment in our common future. It’s not about me … it’s about how I invest myself in others.

The Precious Stillness Awaits

I came across this quote from Edward Abbey today … "Climb the mountains, bag the peaks, run the rivers, breathe deep of that yet sweet and lucid air, sit quietly for a while and contemplate the precious stillness, the lovely, mysterious and awesome space."

Edward Abbey was an author and essayist, called “the Thoreau of the American West.” His quote definitely speaks to that, in terms of the wide open country he speaks and writes about. I can place myself in his “scene”, not just in terms of what he describes, but also in what it means to me.

It reminds me of the Jesus Prayer we shared in our Why Catholic group ... meditation that night was actually a first for me, and it was a great start. We are rarely out in the wilderness that Abbey describes but we can definitely go there in our minds ... that is the power of meditation. 

This passage also speaks to the wonder that is God and the nature He provides for us. For me it is about somehow achieving a oneness with God, in that "precious stillness" and surrounded by the "sweet and lucid air" of real nature. Or not ... I love the last line as well, because life itself is a "lovely, mysterious and awesome space."

Today I will take the time to go myself into the "precious stillness" that we can all find, if we but close our eyes and imagine.

21,004 Days. And Counting.

From a great homily by Father Jim Scherer, at St. Paul the Apostle in Greensboro … he talked in wonder about his life and the fact that he had lived 26,000 days. It struck me that most of us have never realized what our own number is.

There are lots of thoughts and ideas out there relating to days. Seize the day. Oh happy day. It’s a brand new day. Take it one day at a time. There are likely many many more.

So I calculated today that I have lived a total of 21,004 days on this earth. That seems amazing to me, when you look back at it that way. As Father Scherer said, it is indeed a wonder to look at, for any of us. I’m sure even young adults looking at their total would be surprised.

I look at that total of 21,004 and it says a lot to me. I think of the days of fun, of water and sun and our kids happy in ocean waves and in snow. I think of the wasted days being unhappy or mad at someone. I think of the days with family during holidays, early days with Norma and Aby and my siblings, other days with the Doc and Pat and my new family. I think of the days spent anxious, in fear of things that never happened. I think of days walking the quads at Notre Dame, not fully realizing how special those were. I think of 4 months of dark days in depression, and how only my wife and Jesus helped me through those … I think too of the first 5 days I spent recovering with the help of professionals. I think of the days spent on the soccer sidelines or stands, on the beaches and in the mountains, with family and with friends. I think of the days spent in Boston and Buenos Aires, in Valparaiso and Washington, in Minneapolis and South Bend. And especially in Greensboro. So many memories, so many days.

Every day is a blessing, a miracle really. I don’t think about that often enough. We are granted just so many days and then, our time here is up. Am I doing all I can to fulfill my purpose, every day? Am I doing everything I can to create a positive legacy, every day? Is my every day in some way adding to the world, even if it’s just my corner of it?

There is a quote I saw that said “Make the most of your day … those that have passed on would do anything to have the time you have right now.” I understand that better now, as I think about that homily. Today I thank God for every day He has granted and those He will grant me still.

Crazy About You

I received this very cool idea last week in an email from Nora, my Godmother in Cincinnati. It brought God into a new perspective for me, and it was too wonderful to keep to myself … “If God had a refrigerator, your picture would be on it. If He had a wallet, your photo would be in it. He sends you flowers every spring, and a beautiful sunrise every morning. Whenever you want to talk, He'll listen. He could live anywhere in the universe, and He chose your heart. What about the Christmas gift He sent you in Bethlehem, not to mention that Friday at Calvary.

Face it. He's crazy about you.”

Isn’t that a great way to think about God? He is in love with us, totally crazy about us. Even when we turn away. Even when we try to ignore Him or disappoint Him. Even when we get distracted. Even when we get attracted by another “shiny object”.

Most loves in our lives would leave in a huff, if we treated them shabbily. The magic would be gone, the relationship would be over. But that is not God. God is ever there, working in His own way, reminding us that He cares deeply and always will. He is there in our thoughts, in our actions, in our doubts and fears. He is there in our moments of triumph and He sits with us in our moments of despair. He is there on our first day and on our last day, watching over us.

Whatever you think of God today, there’s only one true thing you need to know and to make a part of your understanding … He really is crazy about you. Pray on that today.

The More You Are Blessed

Every year, I get an opportunity to serve people less fortunate, thanks to the kindness of our company and our CEO. We participate as servers working at the Thanksgiving Banquet held by the Orlando Union Rescue Mission, a Banquet in downtown Orlando that provides a hot Thanksgiving meal and so much more to over 1,200 homeless individuals and families. It is a blessing that I and many of my teammates at work can do this, year after year. And yesterday was another memorable day of praise … OURM and its people are so in touch with what people most need. They are a remarkable group and among the best Christian role models I have ever met.

Our CEO has always said, the more you are blessed, the more of a blessing you must be. That is exactly what God asks of us too. We are blessed because we are His but we are doubly blessed because we can bless others in so many ways. Thanksgiving is all about saying thanks. And imagine how thankful God is when we act in His name. When we share our time, talent and treasure. When we reach outside ourselves.

Today I pray that every person that reads these words, whether you are many or few, realizes the gift we all have. We live as human blessings, each of us called to choose how best to express our gifts. Blessings come in all shapes, sizes and modes … they are given by us all, consciously and sub-consciously, in ways planned and spontaneous. And they are our very best testaments to our faith.

Remembering Norma

Today is my late mother’s birthday and I miss her.

Our Norma was a wonderful woman, a true Cuban mother who gave her all to her three children. A widow at 42, in a strange new country where she did not know the language, she led a difficult but happy life. Alone after my father’s unexpected death, she took a night job as a cafeteria worker, leaving behind a career as a high school teacher. The night job allowed her to get the three of us kids off to school on time, with a good breakfast, a packed lunch and a warm hug. Her sacrifice was immense, and it paid off with three independent, educated and successful adults. Life was difficult but happy, every day.

She had no car and no drivers license, so she walked to the bus stops of her life every day and every night. Without extra money, she wore the same boots and coat for decades, ruining her frozen toes in the bitter Minnesota winters. She would cry quietly sometimes, just from sheer exhaustion. But her strength was immense too. She would push us in our studies, work hard to keep us well fed, create ways to make up for the lack of toys at Christmas. She was so strong, and she was devout like no one else I knew.

When she was asked, “How are you doing, Norma?” her response was always the same: “I make it, with the Lord.” That was the message in my eulogy to her. God and Jesus were real to her, and she made them real to us, her kids. She helped us remember what was important: our health, our education and our faith … she called them the three things no one can take from you. I make it too, because she did.

I remember many things but what I remember best is her great smile. It was happy and overwhelming, and it was shared with everyone she met. Her English did get better over time, and she was happy to talk to people and smile with them everywhere she went. She would turn to other tables at restaurants and just strike up simple conversations. She loved sharing with people, whether it was making a cake or a dinner, giving a card or a hug. She was always described by her friends as “que buena” … how good, what a good person. And she was, every day of her life. The smile you see below is the one she always wore … and the one she will wear when I see her again. What a happy day that will be.

Thanks Be To God, Always

From Jeffrey Gitomer’s newsletter #472 this week … "For many people, there is a genuineness about Thanksgiving. For me personally, it’s my favorite holiday. Friends and family gather around and give thanks for the meal, but I’ve always used it for a time of reflection. Who can I call to say hello to? Who do I wish was at the dinner that has passed away? What do I really need to be thankful for? And what actions will I take to show my thankfulness? That’s thanksgiving to me."

We each have our own observances, our own Thanksgiving traditions that are etched in our souls, mostly unchanging and integrated deep in our lives. We give thanks, perhaps in the same old ways, sincerely, not tired but maybe not as “fresh” as they were years ago.

What if we thought differently this year? What if we considered who we would love to have at our table with us? Maybe it is a family member or friend that has passed on. Maybe it is the neighbor that we don’t really know. Maybe it is a person that we admire from afar, or a person from history that we love. Maybe it is even a homeless family that can be truly thankful for food, friends and a warm place to share.

What if we prayed differently this year? What if we took a longer view of Thanksgiving, looking back and into the future? What if we considered all of the prayers of thanks that we have ever made, not just at Thanksgiving but every day, and all of the prayers of thanks we have yet to make. The more we pray, the more we realize that God is with us and always has been, and always will be. The song says it best … “Be not afraid, I go before you always, Come, follow me and I will give you rest.”

I pray that we "be not afraid" to ask for the grace to do God’s will in our days, whatever that means for us this Thanksgiving. I pray that we will always follow God and that, in Him and through his angels around us, we will find rest. Thanks be to God … that is my prayer this Thanksgiving.

What Is Your "Tiny Push"?

A quote I saw in our church bulletin yesterday, from Helen Keller … “The world is moved not only by the mighty shoves of the heroes, but also by the tiny pushes of each honest person.”

What is it that creates your tiny push? Is it a special talent you have, a special interest you can share? Is it tender compassion or physical ability? Is it the ability to listen or the ability to express? Do you push yourself to do more, to bring more, to share more of yourself? What is your tiny push?

Today I will pray that my tiny pushes every day … the random act, the smile, the door held open, the positive meeting, the help I give someone in need, the heartfelt writing, the hug … amount to more of what God calls me to do. I may not be a hero to most, but I can be a hero to someone, every day. You can too.

Feeling Gratitude

From the Everyday Health blog for today … an especially good reminder given the season: How many people realize practicing an attitude of gratitude can improve our health as well?

There’s no doubt that mind and body are connected, and this link is especially apparent when it comes to gratitude. “Research suggests that individuals who are grateful in their daily lives actually report fewer stress-related health symptoms, including headaches, gastrointestinal (stomach) issues, chest pain, muscle aches and appetite problems,” says Sheela Raja, PhD, an assistant professor and clinical psychologist in the College of Medicine at the University of Illinois at Chicago. In another study, young teens who counted their blessings reported more optimism and satisfaction than those who didn’t. Grateful people are also often more content because they don’t spend a lot of time comparing themselves with others, says Raja.

“Feeling gratitude is a sense of what I would call appreciation, wonder and true thankfulness for what has occurred in our lives and what is going on right now, an eager anticipation of what is to come,” says Paula Ryan of Boulder, Colo., author of Giving Thanks, The Art of Tithing. “It’s being present to the wonders and joys of life as it is, without wanting it to be different, and a sense of fulfillment that comes from within, from seeing the good — or the potential for good — in every situation.”

Today I appreciate all the good in my life, pushing aside the uncertainties of the future. I look to the good that will come even from the most stressful situations. I pray for the help of the Holy Spirit as I face difficult days in the future. They are there, waiting quietly and in the shadows, details hidden and unknown to me. But they will not deter me from feeling appreciation and thankfulness, from holding steady to my course, one based on hard work, integrity and character. 

Looking Beyond Today

Maybe you’ve seen this story on CNN. A young woman is pushed into a pool, falls the wrong way and is instantly paralyzed from the neck down. Worse, it happens at her own bachelorette party, days before she is to be married. Worse yet, her best friend is the one who pushes her, playfully. Can you imagine a more drastic change in your life?

But listen to Rachel respond to the CNN interviewer: “It was an accident. Stuff like this happens. And it sucks, it’s a tragedy but my friend is an amazing person and we are still very very close … it’s amazing just how many people this has touched. One of my dreams growing up was like, I want to make a difference and I don’t know how I’m going to do it, and I didn’t exactly have this in mind, but I’m so happy that people are seeing the positivity in my story.”

Seeing the positive in every situation is a gift. Incredibly hard to do but think about it. What is the point of being negative? Does it make you feel better? Does it help, really? Does it make you prouder of who you are? Does it make you happy or satisfied to be negative? Does it create a better day?

What a gift Rachel has. She has been touched by the Holy Spirit, even though she never mentions her religion. Today I pray that people I know realize the gift that they have. The gift of looking for the bright side, looking beyond the small frustrations of everyday life. Our life is not just what we see moment to moment, it is the beginning of something eternal. But how much better to walk that journey with joy in your heart.

Stuck Like Glue

From Time Magazine … “Marriage is like glue,” says Seth Eisenberg, CEO of one of the biggest relationship-education operations in the country. “You can build something with it. Living together is like Velcro. The commitment of marriage gives people the opportunity to grow and thrive in ways that other relationships do not," he says.

Unlike in other countries, cohabitation has not yet proved to be a robust enough marriage substitute for most Americans to believe they can build a family on it. As a successful marriage increasingly becomes the relationship equivalent of a luxury yacht — hard to get, laborious to maintain but a better vessel to be on when there are storms at sea — its status is unlikely to drop.

This article got me thinking about marriage prospects for our own children, who now live in a world in which marriage is no longer a given. We have not yet had to deal with the “living together” part. That said, of my grown children … now ages 27, 25 and 24 … only one has a steady partner. It is a sign of the ages that young people wait longer to consider marriage, after their educations are complete and their careers underway. Relationship-wise, they are no different than most of their peers. The article in Time is worth reading, as you consider your own role modeling in marriage.

But the article got me thinking about prayer life, too.

Are we stuck like glue to Jesus? Or are we only stuck to Him on Sunday, maybe the equivalent of Velcro? Isn’t He the best vessel to be on when things are stormy and we don’t feel as safe as we might? As I sit in church this weekend, I will pray that I can be more “glued” to the Word and to my God.

Wandering Thoughts

From SmartBrief on Your Career … “You'll be much happier at work if you just focus on one thing at a time and do it well,” Darrell Etherington writes. “The difference between really exceeding in the task, and just doing a 'good enough' job, is all about attention. If every time you set out to do a task, you set higher standards for yourself than you did last time, you'll have an easier time maintaining focus and avoiding a wandering mind,” he writes.

This is mindful of the discussion we had in our small church group just yesterday, when we shared the 10-minute Jesus Prayer meditation exercise. Minds wandered, as ours often do. Minds race over a map of our own making, traveling wildly divergent roads. And yet in the quiet, with practice, you can stop the wander. It is in fact all about attention to prayer and Jesus,

I feel this when I pray sometimes: I am focused on the words and then they are gone, almost without my realizing it, replaced by random thoughts. So I start again and focus more on the end result of the given prayer. Again my thoughts may wander and I lose the thread, and realize I do. From our discussion, it seems this is pretty common ... what is that telling us about our mind?

Today at work we watched an interesting video from TED.com, of a scientist speaking about the two sides of the brain and her experience of her stroke. Instructive ... and her "Nirvana" may not be so different from what we look to experience in our own prayer life, sans the stroke. If you want to check it out, here is the link: 

http://www.ted.com/talks/jill_bolte_taylor_s_powerful_stroke_of_insight.html

November 15, 2010

At church once I heard a great quote: there are no pockets in funeral shrouds.

Most of us don’t know much about shrouds, me included. Our knowledge probably starts and ends with the Shroud of Turin, which holds what people says is the visage of Christ. But the quote is clearly more about the pockets than the shrouds.

We’ve always heard the phrase “You can’t take it with you.” So yes the quote says that in a unique way, one that harkens to mortality and links us more to Jesus. But what does that mean to me? What does it mean to you? What does it mean to the world?

To some that may mean money and goods, the very stuff of their life. True you will not bear riches with you on your final journey. We are not Egyptian Pharaohs buried forever with our “stuff”. But isn’t it just as much about what you know … what you can share beyond mere possessions or finances?

Do we take great opportunities to share time and talent, as much as treasure? We have great knowledge at any age … do we use it to best advantage? How can we give away things that could easily stay “in our pockets” but could benefit someone else?

Blogs are one way today that people share, me now included. It’s a new and modern way to open a window on my soul, however that window gets opened and inspired. Justin shares his endurance dreams but there is more there than mere race plans … there is challenge and commitment, dedication and sacrifice. Alyson shares her foreign adventures, though not so often as she and we would like. The Cella family connects, again not so often as all would like. But the truth is that any posting is a revelation, a gift you transfer from your pocket to the world, however that world is defined.

Not to get too deep here, but a tree that falls in the forest has still fallen, even if no one has heard it. We know because the tree will be found some day. What are we sharing or leaving for others to find? It would be a shame to have kept too many gifts safely hidden in pockets, if they can benefit people we know.

Sharing is living. Giving is living. Giving back is really living. Fill your pockets with both talent and treasure, but to a greater purpose that you may live knowing you did your part.

November 14, 2010

From the Annunciation Church bulletin today … Question of the Week: If tonight were the end of the world, what is the one thing you’d make sure to do today?

I asked my wife this question this morning and her answer was that she would call everyone she cared about and tell them she loved them. Good response.

I think I would head to the ocean … a place that I love … and pray that I be worthy enough to see God, and that the people I love be worthy enough to be there too. 

November 13, 2010

Courtesy of a fellow member of our Men’s Group back in Greensboro, Rob Arnett … “God’s will for us is what our will would be if we had all the facts.”

There is so much we can’t know. Isn’t that the reason why we give ourselves up to God’s will? Jo Ann in our Why Catholic small group says it best in a prayer she shared with us … God, grant me the grace to do Your will.

I go back to the Our Father, again: Your kingdom come, Your will be done. We are on this earth for such a short time. And we think we are in control. But if you listen to God, if you really listen in prayer, you realize what folly that is.

I will pray today that I can continue to do God’s will, to share in the way he wants me to share.

November 12, 2010

From the DVD “The Distance: A Triathlete’s Journey” … Before you make it to the finish, you have to make it to the start.

My son is a tri-athlete, so I have a sense for what this quote stands for. If you are serious about doing a triathlon, you must be fully committed to it because it is a very long process of training to “make it to the start” … it is not for the faint of heart or inner will. It takes focus and dedication and sacrifice. This is a serious race.

But the quote makes me think too of our relationship with Christ. If we don’t fully commit to it, and use prayer as our training ground, we may not “make it to the finish” with Him. Prayer is an every day activity, an every day practice that brings us closer to our goal. And that goal is forever. This too is a serious race.

Today I pray that I can continue to build my stamina with Jesus through the practice of personal prayer, because I will never know when I will reach my own finish line. I would love to have Him there.

November 10, 2010

From silentinsight.com, thanks to Marty for passing it on …  there is nothing more I can say. Only by internalizing this will any of us receive true grace. It is our prayer that God is waiting for, and He wants a direct relationship with us. This is one way to create that bond.

Imagine the Lord speaking directly to you:

You don’t have to be clever to please Me. Just speak to Me as you would to anyone who cares about you.

Are there any people you want to pray for? Tell Me their names and ask for as much as you want. I am generous. Trust Me to do what I know is best.

Tell Me about your pride, your touchiness, your self-centeredness, your laziness. I still love you in spite of all your faults. Do not be ashamed in My presence. There were many saints in heaven who had the same faults as you. They prayed, and little by little their faults were corrected.

Do not hesitate to ask for blessings for body and mind, for health, memory and success. I can give everything.

Tell me about your failures, and I will show you the cause of them. What are your worries? Who has caused you pain? Tell Me about it. Forgive them and I will bless you.

Are you afraid of anything? Have you any tormenting, unreasonable fears? Trust yourself to Me. I am here and will not leave you.

Have you no joys to share with Me? Tell Me about them. What has happened since yesterday to cheer your spirit and comfort you? Whatever it was, big or small, remember that I prepared it for you. Show Me your gratitude.

Are there temptations bearing heavily upon you? Yielding to them always disturbs the peace of your soul. Ask Me, and I will help you overcome them.

Go along now. Get on with your work or play. Try to be humbler, more submissive, kinder to others. Come back soon and bring Me a more devoted heart. Tomorrow I shall have more blessings for you.

November 8, 2010

There's ordinary happiness, and then there's beatitude: over-the-top, blissful happiness. I saw this on one of my word of the day emails from Visual Thesaurus.

I have never known what the Beatitudes were, so I will read some from the Bible today and pray on them. 

November 5, 2010

From Little Things Matter … I want to challenge you to put down your shield and start trying to connect on a deeper level with people. Show a genuine interest in people and the things that are important to them by listening and asking questions. Smile more, love more, encourage more, and show your appreciation to those who do things for you.

I pray today that I can connect with the people I know at a deeper level. I pray that I can be a comfort to them, a positive influence, an encouragement. I appreciate more and more lasting relationships and those are built when we lay down our shields.

November 4, 2010

I watched a strange, beautiful, provocative and evocative video on CNN today. It was about a forest at the foot of Mount Fuji, where Japanese often go to commit suicide. The pictures and the audio score were haunting.

The videographer followed a Nature Guard deep through the trees, as he talked about his job as an ecologist in that particular forest. He has found over 100 bodies as part of his daily work in the forest, and on this day he and the video crew came across the remains of a corpse. The Guard said it was likely a year or two old, because it was just bones and clothes.

At another point, he found a bouquet of flowers and a box of chocolates, noting that it was likely left there by family and friends of a suicide victim. He said: You think you die alone but that is not true. Nobody is alone in this world. We have to coexist and take care of each other. That’s how I feel.

Exactly. Suicide is so tempting for people in despair, but the impact is huge. And that’s because we are NOT alone. We have real connections with family, friends, communities … we are never alone. And in our darkest moments, when we feel hard distance between us and anyone else, we are still not alone because we have God watching over us.

I pray today for people in despair, people who are in dark places and thinking dark thoughts. I have been there and by God’s grace can appreciate what the Guard said, because it is so true. We never die alone and we must take care of each other.

November 3, 2010

From Little Things Matter, a blog post I get twice a week: Bertrand Russell once said “Envy is one of the most potent causes of unhappiness. It is a universal and most unfortunate aspect of human nature because not only is the envious person rendered unhappy by his envy, but also wishes to inflict misfortune on others.”

As I get older, I find I am much less envious of other lives. It is my life that matters to me, not what others live or have. I wish no misfortune on others. But I know when I was younger and less wise, it was so much more important to “look around” and see where I stood. Did I really think I needed more than I had?

I am who I am, nothing less than a wiser man with knowledge gained through hard-worn experience. We all get there someday. Today I pray that my children always know that who they are is more important than what they have. There is no place for envy in a blessed life.

November 2, 2010

Facebook post from a good friend and former co-worker: 'A single candle can illuminate an entire room, a true friend lights up an entire lifetime.'

Today I pray for all of my true friends, those who will be there until the end, those who can hug and cry at a moment’s notice. There are special people in our lives who will always be there for us. They have a unique link to us that is strong and powerful, a forever link they share with our families. I pray that each of them know that I am their true friend, and always will be.

November 1, 2010

Seen in an email from Pulse, voices from the heart of medicine: "Who hasn't had the shocking experience of laughing in the face of tragedy? At first it feels wrong wrong wrong. But what a gift it can be, giving us the strength to gather ourselves and carry on. I'll never forget that evening in my late sister's bedroom as we gathered to choose her burial outfit, the fragile hilarity that erupted and the doubts that arose the next day. This is a slice of life most of us will never see."

I read obituaries every morning, just to know if anyone I know in Greensboro has passed on. It’s an odd habit but one that is important to me, so that I can write my thoughts to any family I know. So this little paragraph particularly struck me, as an interesting image of what we think about in facing death.

For me, death has always been a happy occurrence, a time to celebrate life. Laughter should absolutely be a part of a death remembrance. And it makes me think about how joyous I want my death to be. Yes, that is in a way a morbid thought. But think about it: Life is good and, oddly enough, it may be that death will be even better … who is to say? I pray that I live in joy, now and (hopefully) forever. 

October 31, 2010

Marathon man. I think of my son today and pray that he will finish his Marathon with health and hope, no matter how he does. The odds are he will not be pleased with his final result, but he knows (and He knows) the reason: his relative lack of focus in training. You must prepare well for the battle, because if you carry doubt, you are much more likely to fail.

From a post I saw on Facebook: Do not fear sudden calamity if you are walking uprightly before God. It may be setting the stage for a great victory that will bring praise and honor to you and your heavenly Father. These battles are training grounds for greater victories to come.

Postscript: My son finished the Marathon in 3:56 … a wonderful result for most, but a disappointment to him. His goal is to qualify for the Boston Marathon in 2012, and he will now be encouraged do plan much more training to get to the qualifying time he needs. It can be done but only with commitment, dedication and sacrifice. I am positive he will reach his goal … he has the inner strength to do it. I pray for him today.

October 29, 2010

I love Robert Frost. His rhythms are unique and calming, like these words: 
The woods are lovely, dark and deep.
But I have promises to keep,
And miles to go before I sleep, 
And miles to go before I sleep.


None of us are perfect. We make promises and attempt fervently to keep them. But at times we fail. It is God’s help through prayer that can strengthen us. I pray that I may keep my promises ... to myself, my wife, my children, my God and my communities ... as a true child of God. It is not always the easiest thing.

October 28, 2010

Challenges come in many shapes. I saw this on a website, maybe it was TGIF … a great reminder that prayer can especially help in times of great adversity and challenge. Good advice too.

Adversity comes in all sizes and shapes. No one adversity is like another and no one person’s adversity is less important than another’s. I wanted to let you know that the season you are in will pass and God will make something good of your experience. The keys to getting through your adversity are:

1. Take one day at a time and ask God for grace for that day only.
2. Don’t project outcomes to the future. In other words, don’t think about all the ramifications of what “may” happen resulting from your circumstances.
3. Meditate on the Word of God and be obedient to the small things He shows you.
4. Spend time alone with God and praise Him. We overcome the spirit of anxiety and heaviness through praise.
5. Reach out to others in the midst of your pain.

I pray that I can use this process whenever a crisis strikes, as it will.

October 27, 2010

A birthday thought today, as I read this passage from Sacred Space … “I imagine myself as a light, a source of illumination and comfort, bringing clarity and hope. I ask God to help me to live as a child of the light in my ordinary circumstances.”

I think today of one of our children who may be an outlier in terms of faith. Raised the same as his siblings and a graduate of a Catholic university, he seems to me to remain a bit outside the church. Not adamantly so but perhaps not linked in the same way that the rest of his family is. I truly don’t know the reason why but I pray that I can break through and find out, perhaps when we are together as a family. It is important to me that he know what I think, and what I hope for him, in terms of his faith.

October 24, 2010

"It is easier to build strong children than to repair broken men." … Frederick Douglass

You never know where you’ll find inspiration. This quote was at the bottom of an email signature in an email that was passed on to me … the email was from the creator of the television show Baywatch (of all things).

As a parent, most often my prayers have to do with my children. My wife and I have put in decades of work … loving, teaching, helping, counseling, comforting, and often worrying, too often. Prayers are sent to God for their welfare and for their futures. And right now, we are praying that God help our children, all of them, take the road that is right for them.

I continue to pray that our children hear God’s advice, so that their lives can be everything they can be and so that their futures will not take them down unworthy roads. I pray for strong children and strong role models that will outlive me.

October 22, 2010

From the Sacred Space site … “One way into prayer is through the imagination. Take a Gospel scene and read the text slowly; then read it again. Place yourself in the scene, standing beside Jesus, watching him as the Pharisees lay a trap with their question. If you can, see the place, the people, the coin of tribute. Imagine the tension provoked by their words. Be present with Jesus as he asks for the denarius. Hear his voice as he exposes the hypocrisy of their flattery, but takes their question seriously and gives an answer that has echoed down the centuries: Give therefore to the emperor the things that are the emperor's, and to God the things that are God's. Savor its implications." 

What a great concept, a wonderful way to think about prayer. It’s not just me alone, it is me and my God … this is a good way to remember that prayer can form a stronger bond with our God. I will share this with my group at our next meeting.

October 21, 2010

From the TGIF site today … “Talents must be mixed with faith. Talent alone is not enough. Faith alone is not enough. It is only when the two are combined that God's power is released and manifested in the physical realm. Mix your unique gifts with faith today; you will be surprised at the power of God that will be manifested.”

TGIF in this sense means Today God is First … it’s a site that has some good thought starters, though it’s a more “retail” site than others. I get emails and glance over them for inspiration.

How true this paragraph is. I pray that my gifts, combined with my example of faith, will inspire others to see what their possibilities are. 

October 20, 2010

“If you don't do what's best for your body, you're the one who comes up on the short end.” … Julius Erving

One of our weight loss facilitators threw out this quote she got from Facebook, in the context of our setting new goals for our next month. It got me thinking about the more “earthly” things we pray for, but also the juxtaposition of it with our spiritual life.

After all, the quote could just as easily apply to our inner lives … it is definitely true that “if you don’t do what’s best for your soul, you’re the one who comes up on the short end.” And really, that short end could last forever. Now that is an idea and prayer topic well worth pondering.

What am I doing today that is good for my soul? I will pray on that today.

October 18, 2010

“He said to his disciples, “Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life … can any of you by worrying add a moment to your lifespan?” … Luke 12:22-25

It is so true that we spend altogether too much time concerned about small things that have no real impact on our lives. it is like the married couple that argues about every little thing as they get used to each other, only to find later that they can go through life with a much more positive spirit and energy, if they will but stop worrying about insignificant issues.

As I get older, I see that what is most important is relationship building. First with Jesus but also with those I care about. Today I pray that the young people in our lives see more clearly that fact, sooner rather than later. It is in fact “long range thinking” and that was not my forte either, in my 20s … but that truth cannot be dodged. Now is always the time to get closer to our Lord, because you never know the day you will meet Him in person.

October 16, 2010

From NPR Weekend Edition and Scott Simon, regarding the miners in Chile: “The first 17 days were hardest … some of the men squabbled, which they made a pact never to speak about. Chile’s President said: You are not the same after this, neither are we. “We” embraces the world. Millions of families watched and got our children out of bed to watch the men rise from the earth. We told our children ‘remember this night, whenever you think something is impossible’. This week it was good to be reminded that skill, courage and dedication can move the earth. When 33 men were buried, people uncovered strength they never knew was inside. Failure was not an option. This week, we were all Chilean … Viva.”

How much belief does one need to have, in what must have seemed like a tomb? I can imagine fear was in everyone’s mind and stomach, especially during the first 17 days when there was no word from above. Or at least from humans above. God alone was able to get through to them those first days and the miners were forced to listen, to hope and to believe.

I pray today that those who are in a sense “entombed” inside frustrating or anxious or even desperate lives, find the God who can get through to them. It is hard to listen but not as hard as the 33 men had it. And there is survival in the end, if you let God into your tomb.

October 15, 2010

I pray for a family I know well, and especially for their daughter … a daughter laid low by disease and living with an addiction to pain medication. It is a tremendous burden on the entire family and a crushing weight for her, at 24 no longer able to live the life she had begun to build for herself. She is a young lady who always lived life out loud … my prayer is that she regain her life and better health.

I spent almost 3 hours with her last night and it felt like a ministry. The tension at her house is so palpable, she lives for moments away from it, with a different adult to talk to. She is not easy to speak with, as the pain medications have her doing much too much of the talking, almost machine-gun style. But being with others gives her energy and is such a difference from the time spent in bed, either in pain or in a daze.

One thing really struck me, and it cuts both ways. She was describing how she feels when the pain comes into her mind, the headaches that strain her, the hot sweats of pushing toxins out of her system. And then she said: When I take the first of my pain meds, it feels like Jesus blowing in my face … it feels like His breath, and the pain starts to lessen.

On the one hand, that is so scary. I have read about and seen movies where the addiction to heroin and crack is so intense, it seems like a religious experience. The addicts give themselves up to the high, almost like a sacrifice. They are in another world, but probably not with Jesus. On the other hand, how does she see Jesus? In her mind, is her mentioning Him a way to express how positive the feeling is, a way to show she is still “with Him”?

Hard to say, but I pray today that she finds her way back to Him and back to herself. I pray that she will accept the need she has to be weaned from the pain medicines she is addicted to. Jesus can help, if she lets Him.

October 13, 2010

Today I will meditate on what this short prayer means …

Glory be to the Father, and to the Son, and to the Holy Spirit,
As it was in the beginning, is now and ever shall be, world without end.

In my mind, “world without end” speaks to me directly. It means that my world, which I only see a part of, will never end … I mean that my soul will live on. For me that is the promise of this prayer.

When I think of “as it was at the beginning”, I see God forming me … my person, my soul. I see my birth in a whole new way. I can take the prayer personally rather than as a prayer that is generic or that applies to the Genesis story. It is about me too … it is my world that is without end.

So many people see death as the end, but those of us with true faith know we are destined to live on, even in death. For us, heaven is not a figment of our imagination. It is real and abiding … it is there waiting for us. It is our reason to live. We need not be afraid … so many people we have known have gone on, and so many people we love will join them. We are a few steps away ourselves … we just need to see that as a great and wondrous thing, not an innate fear we have.

October 12, 2010

Today I commit to prayer in a more disciplined way, using a journal to track my progress. My first prayer is that I can use my writing interest to create a stronger dialogue with Jesus. Perhaps this is a journal I should have started long ago, because God knows how important His prayer has been to me.

My most important prayer has been the Our Father … it has soothed me during my darkest days of depression, and it continues to be the anchor to my prayer life. In truth, I don’t think I have ever completed a rosary of Hail Marys but rather have always gravitated to the Lord’s Prayer.

To this day, I focus on one phrase … protect us from all anxiety. There is much that one can be anxious about in daily life, but once you see life as a continuum of progress until death, you realize how little there really is to worry about. It may be that the most important issue in life is being ready to die. Not in a morbid sense or a secular sense, with all of your affairs in order. But ready because we have a relationship with Jesus that will bring us to life everlasting, as we wait in joyful hope for the coming of our Savior.

My thought today comes from sacredspace.ie … We are never stationary on the path to God, because our prayer changes. Many good people move from using well-rehearsed vocal prayers and pious reflections, to a more silent, wordless sort of presence: Be still and know that I am God. With our oldest friends we do not need to talk. 

Today I will reflect on how God can become one of my oldest friends. After all, He has been in my life forever and always will be.