Mercy in Your Hands

From Tom Hackim, one of our Emmaus Brothers at Annunciation … "Blessed are the merciful, for they shall receive mercy. My brothers and sisters, sweet is the thought of mercy, but even more so is mercy itself. It is what all men hope for, but unfortunately, not what all men deserve, For while all men wish to receive it, only a few are willing to give it.


How can a man ask himself when he refuses ti give to another? If he expects to receive any mercy in heaven, he should give mercy on earth. Do we all desire to receive mercy? Let us make mercy our patroness now, and she will free us in the world to come. yes, there is mercy in heaven, but the rod to it is paved by our merciful acts on earth. As scripture says: Lord, your mercy is in heaven.

Nothing else needs to be said. It is our acts that create our own mercy … it is we who are the conduits of God’s mercy, and it is He who will reward us for every merciful act. May we fill our days with those acts, so that we will be able to see the mercy that awaits us in heaven …  

You Decide, Not Them

"We have to realize that there will always be critics and naysayers in life.But other people don't have to believe in you ... other people don't set the limits to your life - you do. It's not what others say about you that affects your life, but what you say and believe about yourself." ... Joel Osteen 

There’s no question it’s sometimes hard to maintain your belief in yourself at a high level. Disappointments affect us, as do work and personal challenges. Situations that occur leave us wondering. Worry about tomorrow or about others can be a weight on us, too.

But Osteen speaks of the impact that other people have on us, especially in terms of belief. We may all have critics or we may just think we do. Either way, they affect our thoughts and in the worst cases, they may steal our dreams and undercut our goals. It is if and when we allow them to have that much power that we fail ourselves.

You are your best voice. You may ask for counsel or understanding, but clearly you have the ultimate power over your life. And importantly, over your own life limits. Whether a young person striking out to a new location, an adult changing a career path or a retired person finding a new mission, only you can set the limits to your future. And the fact is, God does not set limits. He encourages you to be in charge, but He is there supporting your belief … I pray we all take that responsibility for our own belief seriously. After all, we’re the first ones who can.

Just a Second

"God gave you a gift of 86,400 seconds today. Have you used one to say "thank you?" ... William A. Ward

Just a reminder that all it takes is a heavenly glance to thank God for all we have. A moment in time. A pause in the day. A short prayer. Whatever your approach, it is right. Too often we leave prayer for the Sabbath, or for dire times, or for fervent and urgent requests. But every day is a new opportunity to be thankful and only you have the power to decide how that essential gift can be repaid.

Take the time to acknowledge God, today and every day … it is your own gift to Him.

Valuable, Way Better than Rich

Seen in a Facebook post from Nicole Roberts … “I may not be rich but I am valuable.”

Do you know people that chase the dollar? I do. In fact, I think we see this tendency all around us … in advertising, in all the gotta-have technological gadgets that surround us, in our work lives, when we listen to people young and old. People playing the lottery. People that demand more money for what they do. People that are upset they don’t make more money, many perhaps ungrateful even though they may have a good job.

I understand that tendency. But as many of us have heard from our parents, there is more to life than money. A lot more. And this quote says it all.

We are all more valuable than we imagine, than we see. We are valuable to ourselves, to our family and friends, to the world. We are valuable no matter what we offer. Our value is inherent to us, unique. And it has nothing to do with our wealth.

At the end, it is how valuable you are that will determine your legacy. Not money or possessions. Not bank accounts or work success. God provides us with that inherent value … it is up to us to share our value with the world, and in that, become even more valuable every day.

Looking Twice

“I was angered, for I had no shoes. Then I met a man who had no feet.” … Chinese Proverb.

When we look at situations, too often we may jump to the wrong conclusions, because it takes time and space to truly identify the “value” of an experience, of a turn in your life, of a road you never expected to take. Looking at a situation from a single vantage point is always dangerous … looking at a situation from only your vantage point is even more dangerous.

I love this proverb because it is a stark way to view your lot in life.

Every day we feel emotion, in the now. Every day we see things a certain way, in the now. Every day we react to situations, in the now. But there is usually much more to the story, much more to every story. We know the saying “put yourself in their shoes” and it is a great way to reconsider any situation … whether you have shoes or not.

Are we happy with our lot in life? If so, we are blessed. But if we are angered, maybe we should look twice and consider another outcome. I pray that we have the strength to consider what others face, when we face our own challenges … 

Two Great Days

A wonderful quote to chew on from John C. Maxwell: "There are two great days in our lives - the day we are born and the day we discover why."

When people ask “What was the greatest day of your life?”, I typically have had a ready response. Usually my greatest days center on my marriage or the birth of my children. Most people do have ready answers, because we have memorable moments that are burned into our life history. But Maxwell looks at our greatest days from an angle I had not considered.

I know he is first and foremost a writer focused on business and leadership. But he is a pastor as well and often his quotes go far beyond business, as this one does. It struck me that the “days” he speaks of are likely not easily remembered … and that is a very different perspective to ponder.

To me, his quote speaks first to the fact that we are children of God, each of us born with a life path like no other. Without that first great day … the day of our birth … there are no more, so I understand well the significance it has. But while we love to celebrate birthdays, does the party or the card or the gift do that first great day enough justice? There is so much more “hidden” in the celebration … the real meaning that God has given our life, by our birth in His image and with His grace.

And then there is the second great day, when we discover our purpose. Not just our passion or the perfect job or an innovation we have brought to the world. No, for me “the day we discover why” is the day we accept Jesus … He is the link between our greatest days. And the One who will be there on our last one …

Get Off Your But

Saw this comment posted by a friend on Twitter and it definitely made me think …

The comment was made in this context: We make excuses every day. The question is what excuses do we need to stop using so we can get off our But and make something important happen. The reality is that there is too often a “But” at the end of many sentences. I could have done that, But. I would have done that, But. I should have done that, But. Too much looking backwards at what we failed to do.

That said, not all Buts are bad. It may be that something better came along and an even greater choice was made. It may be that there was not enough time or space to fulfill a plan. Maybe it was a situation where there was no harm, no foul. Maybe the But meant “not yet” or “not now”, rather than a final no or a final excuse.

What the comment reminded me of is the need to look at ourselves honestly and challenge our Buts, maybe even challenge our Buts off if we can. Life is fleeting and there is precious little time for excuses. One of my best friends would call this the “WishIda” syndrome … as in, wish I’d a done that. If we don’t pay attention to what we’re doing, we will have way too many WishIdas in our lives.

Finally, here’s another thing this comment made me think of: “There but for the grace of God go I” … a saying I think about whenever I see a challenge, a tragedy, a person who has been hurt or is suffering. Even a car accident brings that to my mind. It is the grace of God that keeps me whole and living a life through faith … there is no But about that.

Jagged and Smooth

"I remember quite clearly one of my middle school teachers telling me that I was a stone with sharp, jagged edges, but that I would turn into a smooth river stone as I grew older. During the years while I was making this film, I felt like I was getting sharper and sharper instead." … Zhao Ling, a filmmaker of a documentary that angered the Chinese government.

I very much like the teaching of the middle school teacher in China. We are in fact raw when we are young, unpolished in our emotions and maturity. We are jagged with innocence and excitement, with the sprint into life, hot energy burning to know, to grow, to show who we are. We are tumbling through life, making a path in that river … not always clear but often full of dynamic action.

That tumbling makes us wiser. We learn more about life, feel the thrill and too the hard disappointments that we encounter. We are polished by time and space. We see what is and what isn’t … we experience truth and falsehoods, not just about the world but about ourselves. We are more deeply in that river of life and every bend, every bank teaches us … and smoothes our journey and our being.

And then there are those times when we become sharper again, by circumstance or by choice. We take our newfound polish and make a statement … whether making a film or striking out in a new way, changing our lives in ways we never expected. In this, we know what we are about … we know we are at risk, but we see more sharply what we must become. It is a new path, one we are sent toward … in that, He is there, our God of faith. He believes in us and knows that we must be who we were destined to be.

I pray that we see both of our edges, the sharp and the smooth, as two sides of a being rich in detail and rich in faith … we are all jagged and smooth.

An Opportunity

I saw this in a blog called Shelee-notsodeepthoughts and wanted to share it … it is deeper than Shellee knows …

I remember the moment. I remember the circumstances. I remember my words.
"Maybe God is just giving you an opportunity to trust Him."

I remember believing, hoping and praying that she would learn to trust Him.

Lately, my words have haunted from the recesses of my mind.
"Maybe God is just giving you an opportunity to trust Him."

And the still, small voice is pressing hard … "Do you believe? Do you trust me?"

Life doesn't always go the way we had hoped. We don't get a say in the choices of others, and we can't make people do things the way we think they should be done. We don't get to control death, loss, disease. We can't change the diagnosis that will rob our loved one of their memories. We just stand there helpless as we watch it happen.

And, that's what I do.
I watch helplessly as life goes much differently than I had planned.
I wrestle. I wonder. I ache.
I get angry.
I long for control.

Isn't that the root of all sin? My belief that my way is better than His? Isn't that what I am really thinking?

All the while, it is there.
The whispered, "Do you trust me?"

Faith is not something you have, it is something you do. Despite the wrestling, the ache, and the anger you trust; knowing that someday, it will all be redeemed.

Knowing that even though I cannot see it, it is being redeemed.
God is not idle.
I am not alone.
He is redeeming.
Do I trust Him?

Fill Your Space

“Every empty space is an opportunity.” … author Robert Cohen in his short story The Next Big Thing.

Often we are bored, especially when we are young or when we are sick. Time drags. There is nothing to do, or so we think. But there is always time to think, to dream, to plan.

Often there are empty spaces in our lives. We feel them around us, palpable and too often dragging us down into loneliness, sadness, even despair. Widows and widowers know this best, and parents who have lost a child. Empty marriages feel like this too. But it happens to us all, even when there is no dramatic source we can point to.

Often we think of what could be, whenever we are unhappy with our situation or when we have a goal or need unmet. There may be something holding us back … fear maybe, a certain trepidation, a barrier either real or imagined.

I love the quote because it is true, whether in a small way or a larger one. We can look at our current situation, assess it and move forward. We can fill empty spaces with new goals, new thoughts, new actions, new risks, new learning. We can create new opportunity and new happiness which can fill all of the empty spaces.

We can in fact do away with empty spaces if we choose, if we accept the very real responsibility for change … and there is strong faith in that. God is always with us as we create opportunity … 

Tenacity, The Virtue

From the minister TD Jakes … “You’ve got to have a tenacious mind-set. If you believe you can handle it, then you can. God can renew your strength and revitalize your energy. You’re never too old or too young to accomplish your dream.”

Discouragement is easy to come by, and sometimes it comes from those closest to us. For whatever reason, we may see hurdles where they don’t exist, or a lack of belief may come from those that want to pre-judge our capabilities. We may get stopped in our tracks, or stop ourselves … it will make no difference, if we end up believing that there is no hope, that we don’t have anything left,

The quote speaks to a type of mental toughness that is hard-won, a tenacity that can be a virtue in times of trouble. I have a friend who speaks about getting knocked down and getting back up again, and relates it to how winners are made. It is the struggle that makes us stronger. It is tenacity that courses through us, if we do in fact keep getting back to our center, our dream.

Jesus was there too, doubted by some and vilified by many, but willing to endure in order to accomplish His mission. God renewed His strength, even at the last moments of His life when all that was left was to do God’s will. Our challenges will never ever compare but God is there to renew our strength too. Tenacity is a virtue Jesus taught … I pray we may make it a cornerstone of our lives, too.

Peace Within

Shared by Marty O’Donnell … Saint Theresa's Prayer:

“May today there be peace within. May you trust God that you are exactly where you are meant to be. May you not forget the infinite possibilities that are born of faith. May you use those gifts that you have received, and pass on the love that has been given to you.

May you be content knowing you are a child of God. Let this presence settle into your bones, and allow your soul the freedom to sing, dance, praise and love. It is there for each and every one of us.”

Simply put, a prayer of peace and calm and faith, driven by the way we choose to allow His presence into our lives. We have that choice, the one that can bring greater peace to our existence. That choice is inside of us and part of our faith journey, but we may too often choose drama over calm, uproar over peace.

The prayer reminds us that love is what we’ve received and love is what we can build into a peaceful life. We are in fact children of God, we know that … now the task is to show Him in our personal experience of life, through the love that is there for the taking and the showing. 

Faith in Your Mission

From Wisdom Quotes on Facebook … “Success is what we want; faithfulness is what God wants. God will not always ask us if we were successful in what we were assigned to do, but He will always ask if we were faithful.” 

Have faith. It’s a universal truth, no matter your religion. It’s an inherent gift, if we accept it and live it.

At times I have definitely let “success” take priority in my life, and it hasn’t been a bad thing to want to achieve, to advance my life and career. It has helped me grow and provide. It has helped me become more than I was, and a focus on succeeding has kept me contributing with quality, in lots of different ways.

That said, it is faith that I have found deepening in my life. Is it because I am aging? Closer to mortality? Learning more about what is truly important? Maybe a little but there is no disconnect between wanting success and being faithful to Him. The two sides of my life are one, because success is defined in the secular sense AND in the spiritual sense. And we know there are many ways to define success.

I pray that I remain faithful to my mission, to the tasks that He assigned to me and no one else. They come bidden and unbidden, and they offer me new chances to prove that I am who He wants me to be … friend, husband, father, brother, godson, worker, counselor, writer and on and on. No matter the level of success I have in each of my roles, I have faith I am on the right path, because He shares that blessing with me. What God wants, He reveals … every day.

Paddle On

"As one goes through life, one learns that if you don't paddle your own canoe, you don't move." … Katherine Hepburn

The longer I am “on the water”, the more I see that I must paddle my own canoe. In every way I need to.

It isn’t just about making your way or getting somewhere. It’s about making the effort, and persevering. It’s about keeping the craft upright, and out of harm’s way. It’s about taking the opportunity to paddle into uncharted waters, and learning more about yourself and the canoe. It’s about being vigilant and seeing the challenges and the danger and the beauty, and being able to keep on paddling.

It’s about not just floating through life … unless you have the right time and reason to float. The quote tells me that I am responsible for myself, but I know that.  You do too.

We all have our own canoes, our own speeds, our own waterways and our own way of paddling. We all know we need to paddle. I pray we not let anything get in the way of moving forward. And if we need help, ask for it. Look for it. Read for it. It’s about paddling for yourself, so don’t be concerned about other canoes. Yours is quite enough.

Remember Those

From an intercession by our Pastor at Mass recently … “Remember those who will die this day.“

A good reminder, not often heard. We pray for people in our families, for friends, for people we are asked to pray for. We pray for ourselves, that we may be ready.

But this is a different way to think about life and loss. Every day, there is birth and death, all around us. We are all part of the human family, all children of God, all of us worth praying for. This simple intercession reminded me of the quintessential truth that we are all connected, all one with God and all destined to the same fate, in the end.

There is hope in this intercession. Hope that in our praying for “those who will die this day”, we will clearly know how best to bring that important human connectivity into our personal experience of the world. It is by dying that we are reborn … I pray today for every soul who goes before me, that they may be reborn for eternity. And I pray that I have a chance to see them there … 

See It

‎"I will see it when I believe it." ~ Dr Wayne Dyer

This is the simple counterpoint to “I’ll believe it when I see it” but it makes me think anew.

We tell our children that “if you believe it, you can achieve it.” And that is true in every aspect of our lives. If there is something you want, you can usually find a way to begin to move towards it, with a plan or an action or a request.

But the quote makes me think of the Word of God and the Heavenly Kingdom. We have our faith to guide us, and it is when we truly believe that we can “see” more clearly. Without faith … without belief … we are adrift. Without faith, we question ourselves and our way in the world. Without faith, we are swayed by the winds of change, the winds of others. Without faith, we can sink into despair.

With true faith, we believe we are children of God and that means everything. We know that we have a place in His Kingdom, a role to play here on earth and a role to play in His history of faith. We are raised by faith and do more good, when we believe. And we will in fact “see it” when we “believe it” … read the Word and pray, for it is the way to clear vision.   

Celebrate America … and God

“God bless America, land that I love. Stand beside her, and guide her, through the night, with the light from above.” … Irving Berlin.

America is unique among countries, with freedom and independence a privilege since our very founding.

Americans are unique among people, with a boundless optimism born of a knowledge that we live in a country of opportunity.

Immigrants like Irving Berlin, a Russian, and my family know this well, and we do not take this country for granted. For whatever faults we may have as a republic, we have the gift of life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness always within our reach and our imagination.

For that, there is one reason that stands out in my mind: Because from the beginning, we said “In God we trust.” God has helped us from the beginning and He continues to this day. Just look at the fractured states of many countries around the world and you realize just how blessed we are. Celebrate America today … celebrate God today too, because they and we are forever intertwined.

The Track

Shared by my friend Leona Laperriere on Twitter: Native American Proverb … “We will be known forever by the tracks we leave.”

We all leave tracks, don’t we? Childhood memories are tracks. Achievements large and small are tracks. Good deeds are tracks, as are bad ones. Resumes too.

Some tracks have short lifespans … a fleeting moment can even be a track. But even the smallest action can have long tails of repercussion, good or bad. The harsh word, the silent treatment, the cruel joke or the ignoring of a family member or friend … every one a track. And never assume that a track will be forgotten; it carries on as a living memory for you and others..

I know people, young and old alike, who harbor resentment towards their parents, based on their actions. The mother that treated her children differently, the father who expected too much and did not love enough. Parents form the first tracks that children see, and those tracks inform their futures. Parents who model positive behavior build powerful tracks for their children, an awesome responsibility.

There are tracks we see and question, there are others we see and emulate. And there are tracks that take us far and wide, in unexpected ways. Career changes, new cities and countries, new activities and interests, new faith and commitments. Decisions that will shape our future are beginnings of new tracks in and of themselves … the selection of a college, job changes, marriage, a choice of a church. Too many to count and constantly in our path.

Each one of us builds our track day by day, each unique and different. Every action has real and unavoidable impact on our track, on the way we will be known by our peers, our families, our friends and even strangers. And that knowing is forever, part of our past, present and future. What do I want my track to look like, now and at the end? What about you?

Like Facebook, but Better

Seen on Facebook, paraphrased from Wisdom Quotes …

“Think about it … God is a lot like Facebook, but better. He “gets” all wall posts and comments. He accepts all friendship requests. He allows people to de-friend Him but He won’t delete anyone from His friends list. He knows when someone is no longer with Him, whenever a friendship comes to an end for some valid reason. For true believers, He is always available for an online chat. He likes everyone’s posts and requests, and He shares messages of love and gratitude through His friends and yours.”

Clever way to say this. Those of us on Facebook can appreciate the comparison, though Facebook is too often trivial and sometimes feels like the exact opposite of God and His grace. That said, this is a new way of looking at God as a true friend, always there with an ear, no matter what you want to “facebook” about.

• You can share anything, in any way you choose … and He will listen.
• You can be there with Him every day or once in a blue moon … and He will still be available.
• You can forget about Him and spend too much time on foolish things that don’t really matter … and He will wait patiently for your return.
• You can be a constant friend or even stop believing in Him … and He won’t hold that against you.
• You can decide to chat at any time of the day or night … and He will be ready at a moment’s notice.
• You can ask for His help … and He will answer you, in His own way.

There is one thing that I know is different … God doesn’t play games. With Him, all things are for real. Interesting perspective to consider … 

Call Your Mother

Advice from the late Charlotte Bloomberg to her son, Mayor Michael of New York … “Call your mother.”

As a son of Notre Dame, this has special meaning for me.

Before my own mother passed away, it meant being there for her, being available for her joy at hearing from me, too often separated by distance. I was impressed that the Mayor was known for calling his mother every day, and embarrassed that I never had that focus. It is a failing I will live with, and one that instructs my frequent contact with my own children, sometimes too much.

I think about Our Lady, the Virgin Mary, and realize I came much too late to the Rosary and to praying to her on a regular basis. One would think that Notre Dame would have made the process easier, but it was there that I stepped away from the Church, from Our Lady and from my own mother for two years. It was a time of rebellion, a time to walk away from the constant religion my mother pushed on me … now I know what a misunderstanding that was. 

“Call your mother” is advice to be taken to heart, before it’s too late. And I know that “call your Father” is just as important … He and She are there for us, if we but call on them. 

Find a Way

“If you really want to do something, you'll find a way. If you don't, you'll find an excuse.” … Unknown

Our CEO often uses the phrase “All excuses are equal” and I see that too often in our lives. Seth Godin often talks about this in his business blog, the predilection to a lack of action and the use of barriers we ourselves put up, barriers to achievement, effort and success. As a writer I have experienced that … this blog is proof of a very late entry into writing more often for myself, a promise I had been making for years, perhaps decades. I was always just too busy …

Too, this quote from an unknown source relates to what we teach our children every day: Believe it and you can achieve it. That is a hard truth to be sure, but belief is but the first stopping point in success. Action is what’s needed.

So too with our belief in God and in what He asks us to do. It is definitely an important internal need, that belief … but then how do we put it into real action? Do we more often find ways or find excuses? It’s always our choice, we know that … so what small “excuse” am I staring at today, that I can change into a “way” to make a difference for God?

Vertical vs. Horizontal

From the email newsletter Today God is First … “Have you ever been wrongfully accused? Oh, the need to defend and justify becomes so great. "What will people think if they believe these things are true?" we reason. Imagine what Jesus thought as they hurled insults and threats upon Him. The God of the universe had visited planet earth only to be slandered and accused of blasphemy.

Jesus could have done two things in response. He could have used His power to put the people in their place. He could have responded "horizontally." He could have fixed the problem right then. However, He chose to respond in a different way. He chose to "entrust Himself to Him who judges justly."

Ask God to give you the grace to stay vertical with Him. Avoid the temptation of responding horizontally each time some event comes into your life that you want to "fix." Entrust yourself to the one who judges justly. It may be a divine appointment for your growth to another level in grace.”

I am struck by this idea … being and experiencing more vertical than horizontal. It’s such a simple metaphor for how to think more about God and grace, rather than any human slight.

I think about my work day and the meetings I’m so often in, meetings where there is an issue that must be dealt with or fixed. There are ample reasons to fix “it” but often too there is blame associated with “it” … and yes, these secular matters do need to be addressed in order to create success, consistency, understanding and action.

But then I think about the smaller slights we face day to day … we may too often respond horizontally, with anger or despair, with harsh words or the silent treatment, with a hard thought that makes us more upset. What if we looked at issues vertically? We would be much more likely to change our perspective and that is true grace. I pray that I make this more a part of me … because we can grow stronger vertically, and should.

Self-Editing

From CNN, in an article about Holocaust memories … “In the background a clock doesn't tick, it pounds. More than 65 years after World War II, the untold stories of Holocaust survivors -- the dwindling numbers that remain -- will soon be buried forever. If survivors choose to share their stories, with clarity of mind and because it will help them, then wonderful. But they shouldn't feel pressure to open up. If they prefer to take their stories with them to the grave, so be it.

How they've managed to live is by compartmentalizing … we all self-edit our life narratives.”

Think about the memories that Holocaust survivors and World War II veterans have. Harsh and vivid, life changing, disturbing and real, held close and quiet. Impossible to imagine.

I can understand the concept of self-editing in those lives. But I can see that any of us may feel that need, for even less traumatic experiences. We may be ashamed or hurt beyond repair. We may want to hide an unsavory aspect of our past. We may fear the sharing of failure. We may not want to admit truth to ourselves, to others. It may be that we need to self-edit, as a protection mechanism. I can’t say that’s wrong or right.

There is one sure way to free ourselves from that need, through the Sacrament of Confession. There, there are no secrets too harsh to admit. God knows all of our narratives, even if we hide them from the world … that is part of the beauty of having Him as a real force in our lives. With Him, there need be no fear. There is no failure He hasn’t lived through with us. There is no point in self-editing our lives, when we enter that room with our Confessor … we can choose to share, with confidence.

I pray we realize the power of truth in the Confessional … it is freeing.

Heal Me

A quote from the minister TD Jakes … “It takes time for even a small cut to heal. Healing is a process and it takes time. God will give you the oil of compassion and the sweet wind of a sincere love to pour into the wounds.”

I like this quote for lots of reasons. Most importantly, it reminds me that tomorrow is another day. The “cut” I feel today … a disappointment, a frustration, a personal failure, a time of despair or upset, a disparaging word, an unjust act … will in fact be gone tomorrow, soothed by the salve of time and faith. In the moment, it may be hard to see the power of that healing process, but it can begin almost immediately, if you share the healing with a higher power. We are resilient and never more so than when we give our hurts a home in God.

May we realize that the oil and sweet wind of healing that the minister speaks of is a constant. It is there for the taking. It does not happen if we don’t allow it, but only if we offer the “cut” up … that is a gift we share, and one that makes any wound easier to heal, in time.

Father

"Father - to God himself we cannot give a holier name." ... William Wordsworth


This is a such great way to think about fathers, it really struck me when I saw it. 


God is the example and we are the ones that learn every day, so often from our children but from Him too. We are blessed with the miracle of life, the birth of our children, and learn to carefully nurture those lives, much as He does. We are always there for our children, much as He is. We love our children unconditionally, through good times and bad, much as He does. We are fathers in training and model Him in what we do, say and show.


Being a father is a gift I would not trade for anything ... my children and my wife make my life matter, more than anything else ever could. I pray that all fathers appreciate their calling, because there is nothing holier. And I thank my children for the privilege of leading them ...

Use Everything

Erma Bombeck once wrote, "When I stand before God at the end of my life, I would hope that I would not have a single bit of talent left, and that I could say, 'I used everything you gave me'."

Few people today remember Erma, but she was wise and funny all at once. She was an inspiration, the Oprah before there was an Oprah. Hugely popular and a truly giving person.

The point she makes is true for us all. We have gifts unique to us, talents we know and others we figure out later. Finding them … and finding ways to express them … is one of our jobs, maybe one of our most important. We can look at our lives and realize we are in fact filled with talent, but we may not fully appreciate it.

But here’s the thing … a single mother has a rare talent, keeping her family together and raising responsible citizens … a senior citizen has a rare talent, sharing knowledge and memories and a more tender care for life … a businesswoman has a rare talent, building a company that employs people that don’t have the resources to do it for themselves … a priest has a rare talent and an opportunity to bring people the comfort of faith … and you too have a rare talent, whatever it may be. And your talent never ends. It builds on itself, changing shape with time and experience, revealing itself in many different ways and many different places.

I pray that, like Erma, we can stand before God someday and know that we did in fact use everything we were given … every last bit.

Grammar for Life

From the Wisdom Quotes page on Facebook …

Live in the active voice … think more about what you make happen than what happens to you.
Live in the present tense … without regret for the past or worry for the future.
Live in the first person … knowing yourself rather than finding fault with others.
Live in a singular number … caring more for the approval of your own conscience than for the applause of the crowd.

Not much to add to this list … the point is to live for your own self, not for others. We get too easily overwhelmed with life, concerned about the wrong things, swayed by what's petty or fun. We don't listen to ourselves enough. We need "Me Time" in order to live this way ... I pray we can find it more and more. It can be a salvation ...   

Take Notice

My hometown paper had an article about Brigitte Gann, a woman suffering from Lou Gehrig’s disease, ALS. She can no longer speak, but this is one of her written responses to the Question: What is your idea of mortality?

“We all think we will live forever and we plan our lives accordingly. If you ever watched the movie “Tuesdays with Morrie” or read the book, Morrie said, “When you know how to die, you learn how to live.” Nothing could be more true.

I have learned what is important and what is not. The truth is all any of us have is today. I have understood that truth for a very long time. My sister lost her life in the blink of an eye. My husband Jay and I both have faced our mortality more than once. Jay had a heart attack 12 years ago on April 9, 1999. He was bitten by a copperhead snake. He nearly bled to death following a routine sinus surgery. I was in a serious car accident at the age of 18. I was told I may have ovarian cancer in 2004 but thankfully did not. I had chest pain in 2006 and had to be rushed to the hospital and had two blockages requiring stents.

This diagnosis of ALS is cruel and heartless. But on the other hand, I have been given a gift: A gift of time to settle my affairs and shower love on all the people in my life. So many people do not get that gift of “notice”. My advice to everyone would be to make their own gift of notice by living today as though they had been diagnosed. Learn how to die so you can learn how to live … and do it while you can.”

A clear and convincing message, from someone who knows, really knows, the true value of life and of time.

Not many of us think about the issue of “notice”, of knowing in advance that we have a limit to our days. But the fact is we all do have a limit, and we know it right now. It is a fact that many people avoid, and yet there it is, in our future. Not yet blocking our path but instead patiently waiting somewhere down the road, just around one of the corners we may or may not see coming.

The reality is that there is no real need for a dire diagnosis … we know our days are numbered. And that is a good thing, taken from the viewpoint of eternal life. Until that final day comes, let’s not just mark time … take the time to live life, assure your affairs are always in order, shower love on the people in your life … and do it while we can.

The New Face of Poverty

An article from the Greensboro newspaper … worth the read:

They don’t look poor. Until they show you. There’s the refrigerator dotted with family pictures. Open it. It’s empty. The pantry: empty. Cupboards: empty. Under the sink: watered-down dishwasher detergent. In the bathroom: McDonald’s napkins for toilet paper.

The walls are bare, not by design but by choice, in case they need to leave quickly. Pull up a chair. You’re welcome to stay for dinner. As long as you like soup.

Poverty has a new face: families. In May, 13.9 million people were unemployed — more than at any other time on record — according to the Bureau of Labor Statistics. And with unemployment so high for so long, most economists predict it will take years before the country will fully recover. To say nothing of the American family. Since the recession hit in December 2007, they’ve been dropping out of the middle class in droves. And falling deeper into poverty.

At Mary’s House, a Greensboro shelter for women and children, staffers have heard something equally as heartbreaking: former donors asking for assistance. “You have always had the chronically poor, but this is as bad as I’ve ever seen,” says Craig Thomas, the passionate 62-year-old executive director. “These are people who never had to ask for help in their lives. Never. The adults I feel bad for ...” Thomas has to stop for a second. “The children haunt me. They’re innocent victims in all this.”

This is why our company focuses so much on helping the homeless, the people much less fortunate than most of us. They are not just the stereotype you may have in your minds. They are families, moms and dads and children. Lives changed in ways they never expected. And make no mistake … it could happen to many of us. These are difficult days and we are blessed if we are employed, safely housed and able to feed our families. There are so many that are on the edge or over it. I pray we keep them in mind, and help however we can.

You, Already Free

A Facebook post from a new friend, Andrew Burling … “The key to being free is the revelation that you already are. You are free to choose your thoughts, you are free to choose your words and you are free to choose your actions. Those three things create your life.”

Well said and so true. And we know this, of course … but isn’t it also true that too often our own freedom is undermined?

Sometimes it’s our own doing … we think the wrong thing or doubt our abilities, we speak without thinking or even lash out in ways that will come back to haunt us, we take what we know is not the best action because it’s easier or safer. more expedient. We make the choices that constrain us rather than the choices that can open our lives to greater success. We turn away from opportunity, in fear. It happens more often than we’d like to admit.

Sometimes the limitations to our freedom come from outside of us. Situations may put us in difficult spots where we don’t feel we can express ourselves … in our thoughts, words or actions … in the way we’d normally choose. We may feel helpless, stuck. We may even feel like we’re getting run over, as if we don’t exist.

But obviously we do exist, and it is freeing to realize … truly realize, deeply realize … that WE are in control. We are in fact already free to focus or refocus our lives, to create a more positive vibe in our minds and through our words. And by far most importantly, we can make new choices and act on them. Every day.

Isn’t that the only way to create the lives we seek? God gives us each the mind that can choose the right thoughts, the voice that can choose the best words, the will to choose the precise actions that will help us build the lives we long for. That is true grace, a blessing there for the taking. With God’s help, I pray we each internalize that freedom, breathe it in and own it … it is the best and only way to create the life you want, and the life you deserve.

Stand Up

"Fall seven times, stand up eight.: ... Japanese Proverb

It’s the key to a great life. Call it attitude or persistence or stubbornness. Call it courage or bravery or guts. Call it faith.

Whatever you call it, it is your inner will to live, to fight on, to transcend every challenge ... it is that which defines you. It is your soul showing itself to the world. It is your best trait and the clearest proof of your faith, in yourself and in the God that provides.

Never think that you can’t do it, whatever “it” is … your faith will carry you through. 

The Comma

“Never put a period, where God has placed a comma.” -- George Burns

Nicely said. And by the man who actually played God ... 

We tend to think in terms of black and white. Life affects us in strange ways, and too often we are negative in how we project the future. Sometimes that negativity affects our health. I myself suffered though this and came out of it stronger with the help of my family and faith in Jesus. So the quote resonates with me, because I have seen "endings" become new beginnings ... you have too.

There is always hope in the comma. God provides us with inborn hope, with every breath we take. Yes, there is a period out there for each of us. But until then, we have life, and hopes, and dreams, and accomplishments that we revel in, and failures that we learn from. We do get knocked down but what do we usually do? We get back up again. And again and again.

I pray that I never put an artificial period where one was not meant to be ... let me live knowing that there is always a comma, a continuation to the story, a lesson yet to be learned, a path that will open before me. I like George Burns a lot, because he is wise ... like God.

The CAN

Saw an interesting post from one of our LIMU Members, Cindy Hockenjos, relating part of a Joyce Meyer message ... "Miracles come in CANS" ... I haven't heard the actual message but it definitely made me think.


Our lives are miracles in and of themselves. If you really stop to think of what the human body needs to accomplish every second, you wonder at the miracle of it. If you have ever seen a Body Works exhibit looking inside the human body and its intricate systems, you know what I mean. Standing here, whether well or ill, we are living miracles.


Our minds are a miracle too, not just physically but in what they are capable of, the range of human emotion that they encompass. And here is where I see most clearly the message about CANS. We can in fact create our own miracles, if we believe. We can in fact change the course of our lives, if we believe. If we can see it and believe it, in our hearts and in our souls and in our minds, it is possible. It is often in the CAN that we find the solution we seek.


I know the component of faith is huge in this context ... both religious faith and personal faith in the self. It is because He DID, that I CAN. It is because He created me, a miracle, that I CAN walk in His path and create my own miracles, whether as a parent or as teacher or as an innovator. Because He believes in me, I CAN believe in myself ... and there seems to me no greater power than understanding that you CAN, every single day.

But They Also Linger

Seen on a Sportscenter profile of a 22-year old coxswain who died of lung cancer ... From her mother: "Whatever the pain has been, and it is more than you can ever imagine ... every moment of pain is worth the joy that she brought to me, every minute of the pain is worth it." From the narrator: "Lives end but they also linger ... "


We all have a lingering memory of someone who has died. Someone close or someone farther outside our circle, someone who affected us. And the fact is every life ends and also lingers in our memory. As I get older, I realize that there are so many people that have touched me, people I will remember on their passing or even in my final days. I see the daughter and the mother in this feature, and know I am and will be both.


Living away from my hometown, one of the first things I do every morning is check the Greensboro paper online to see if anyone I know has died. It's not at all a morbid exercise, though it does keep me in touch with my own mortality ... I only look to celebrate their life in some way, even if only in a guest book post for their family. Every life counts. That I know well, and more well as I get closer to my own obituary. There too I don't see it morbidly ... it is a reality for us all.


Lives end but they linger deeply ... I pray I remember that every day, and bring more joy than pain every day.

Small Deeds

From Robert Ahola on Facebook … “Great acts are made up of small deeds.” … Lao Tzu. Robert goes on to say … “Much respect, admiration and honor goes to the Japanese people for the impeccable way they have handled their catastrophic natural disaster. Their integrity, dignity and humanity is a model for the world.”

It has been almost three months since the earthquake and tsunami in Japan, and there is no doubt that life continues to be very difficult for the people there. As we have seen, their response has been amazing and inspiring, the very essence of faith and dedication. The disasters' impact will last forever, as will their example of just how each person can make even the direst of circumstances an opportunity to do the right thing, with dignity.

Small deeds, person by person, make all the difference. We exist moment to moment in lives filled with opportunities for "small deeds" ... usually nothing dramatic, but countless chances to affect those around us in small ways and large. And to affect ourselves, in the moment and as our enduring memory. We turn away from those moments at our peril, because there are so many others waiting and even hungry for our impact.

I pray that it is not disaster that impels us to positive deeds that ripple outward, but instead our inborn spirit and humanity ... every small deed may not lead to great acts, but we can never tell which combination of small deeds will be remembered as our legacy.

It's About You

From Wisdom Quotes ... "Life is not a race but a journey to be savored every step of the way."

The website listed some of the rules for the journey and I could have written a separate blog for each one of these. But I wanted to share them all and just say this ... it's about YOU. It's about what you think about yourself, what you consider important to your own life, what you choose to do that makes you happy and satisfied with your contribution to the world. Every one of us has that choice, and every choice is as valid as the next, if it is worthy of our life. So listen to your soul, make your own path and know that integrity, confidence, persistence, courage, vision and peace are yours ... enjoy the journey, whatever rules you live by. That is what God expects of you and from you, so be aware of your path ... 

• Don't undermine your worth by comparing yourself to others. It is because we are different that each of us is special.
• Don't set your goals by what other people deem important. Only you know what is best for you.
• Don't give up when you still have something left to give. Nothing is really over till the moment you stop trying.
• Don't be afraid to encounter risks. It is by taking chances that we learn to be brave.
• Don't dismiss your dreams. To be without dreams is to be without hope; to be without hope is to be without purpose.
• Don't run through life so fast that you forget not only where you've been but where you’re going.

The Holy and Hidden Heart

Seen in Wisdom Quotes … “Listen to your life. See it for the fathomless mystery that it is. Touch, taste, smell your way to the holy and hidden heart of it, because in the last analysis all moments are sacred moments and life itself is grace.” … Frederick Buechner

Great advice. Maybe the best we could ever take.

We spend altogether too much time wondering about what’s "next" in our lives and altogether too little time in wonder about what he calls the “fathomless mystery” that life is. Life is such a gift ... think about it. Don't think about the details. Just think about the largest picture of your life ... every breath you take ... the way the human body is built and works ... the way the eyes see and the ears hear and the brain thinks ... the hope that you can create in yourself and the love you can give to others ... the soul you harbor. All of it an immense mystery.

Every moment on this side of the grass is indeed sacred. Those that have passed on would give anything for just one of those moments. As he says, life itself is grace ... enjoy it, live it, thrive in it. Don't waste a moment because life is precious, and short ... pray on that today.

The Point of No Regret

A Facebook post from BC Fleming, a soldier who was blown up and almost killed in Iraq, and is now a motivational speaker … “What I thought when I felt I was on my deathbed: 1.”I didn’t do enough with my life.” 2. “What did I do that mattered?” 3. “Why didn’t I treat people better?” If you aren’t living your life with others in mind, I feel sorry for you, because you’re going to ask the same regretful questions I did when your life comes to an end.”

Brian Fleming calls himself “Blown Up Guy” because he was hit by an IUD on patrol but lived to see another day. The picture says it all. Or does it?

For me, the “pictures” … what happens to us and whatever pictures we have in our own lives … are the cause, and the emotions … the feelings, the changes and the questions we have to answer … are the effect. It is the questions we ask ourselves when something happens that matter first, and then what truly matters most is our response. Our attitude. Our change in perspective.

The key word in his quote for me is regretful. What can we do today, to minimize our regret later? That’s really the point of his statement … because the pain of regret is one of the heaviest weights we can bear. How can we lessen that burden? Worth thinking about that.

Love Away

‎"None of us has the power to make someone else love us. But we all have the power to give away love, to love other people. And if we do so, we change the kind of person we are, and we change the kind of world we live in." … Rabbi Harold Kus.

You hear people say that “it’s all about you” … most often, that is said in a negative way. And yet, as this quote so eloquently states, it is in fact all about you. You shape yourself and your world. There is no one else that can do it better.

Beyond the fact that Jesus commanded us to the task of giving away love, it is in our nature from the very beginning. As babies, we snuggle and cuddle … we hug and kiss … we laugh when someone makes a funny face … all expressions of love when we cannot speak. Most often, we take care of our bodies … we follow the law … we do the right things … we love ourselves. Those too are expressions of love.

But the greatest power is surely in giving love away. Much as Jesus did. Much as my Emmaus brothers do. Much as my family does, to each other. Much as we try to do with a smile, an opened door, a courteous wave in traffic. We give away love every day, in ways we never realize … it is just a gift we have, a gift that God granted us.

I think of all the ways I can express love to others … this blog is one, but almost every hour there are several that I can think of. Responding in kindness to an email counts. So do Facebook posts for birthdays and thank you cards and letters. So does taking the time to read and think. So does really listening to what others are saying. The act of giving love away is unending … do it more and we will change the world more than we can imagine.

Today’s post from Ralph Waldo Emerson fits in perfectly … “Your genuine action will explain itself, and will explain your other genuine actions. Your conformity explains nothing. The force of character is cumulative.”

And the 30-day action prompt today does as well: It is more genuine to be present today than to recount yesterdays. How would you describe today in only one sentence?

Here is mine: Today is always the best day to give your love away, because it most becomes you to share that gift as often and deeply as you can ... what is yours?

15 Minutes to Live

"We are afraid of truth, afraid of fortune, afraid of death, and afraid of each other. Our age yields no great and perfect persons." ... Ralph Waldo Emerson.


Just joined a 30-day writing challenge linked to Self-Reliance, one of Emerson's works. Today's prompt comes from author Gwen Bell: You just discovered you have fifteen minutes to live. Set a timer for fifteen minutes. Write the story that has to be written.

Go. I think mostly of the time I spent out of balance in my life, because in writing that I warn my children that it is so easy to be seduced by success, by the striving and the need to win, to show knowledge and to have power. In the early days, it is so simple to succumb ... everyone around you is on the same path. In the middle days, it is so easy to yield and continue, even in the face of small doubts and unhappiness; you think that I have almost made it, I am closer than ever. And then, in the later days, you realize that was not the point of the exercise at all. Life could have been different, if you had reached differently or perhaps written down your goals and looked at them hard. Anything could have been different, and most of all you might have used your gifts to greater advantage, with more passion and clarity. Do not be seduced by money or by what is expected. Live so that when there are truly only 15 minutes left, you know that you have lived well with as few regrets as possible. It is in some ways too late for me and in other ways, the perfect time to start a new beginning. There is always time for that. And there are usually many more stories that have to be written. Write them, now.

The Price

In a letter to a war widow during the Civil War, President Abraham Lincoln wrote “I pray that our Heavenly Father may assuage the anguish of your bereavement, and leave you only the cherished memory of the loved and lost, and the solemn pride that must be yours to have laid so costly a sacrifice upon the altar of freedom.”

On this Memorial Day, let us remember all of those loved and lost. They may not be members of our own families, but they are in fact brave individuals we most look up to. They are our true heroes. It is their sacrifice that we celebrate today … their willingness to lay down their lives for all of us. Many … too many … died young, with hopes and dreams unfulfilled. In wars past and present, they paid the ultimate price. And through their valor and faith, we live in peace today, secure in our freedom.

How alike they are to Jesus. These men and women died to protect our lives here on earth … Jesus died to protect our eternal lives with the Father. There is only one way to repay their sacrifice, that high price … preserve and honor their memory. We do that today, for the love of our Veterans … and I pray we do it every day, for the love of Jesus. 

Getting Your Bearings

From an article in the New York Times, about the internal GPS in Joplin … “These days, even Joplinites have trouble navigating their transformed city. Mayor Woolston, for example, grew up in Joplin, went to a local middle school (now damaged), went to the local high school (now destroyed), left for a career in the military and returned more than two decades ago. He knows Joplin — or knew it.

“Particularly at night, but also during the daytime, areas that you’ve gone through thousands of times — you just don’t recognize,” Mr. Woolston said. “I have to stop and get my bearings to realize where I am at, simply because everything is just completely altered.”

None of us can imagine what Joplin feels like today, a place where the old familiar landmarks are often no more, where you cannot always comprehend where you stand. That is such a powerful metaphor for our lives and for the power of our faith.

We have an inherent GPS that guides us, though we may not always listen. We have values and beliefs as our landmarks, though we may not always live them. We have ways to navigate life in our hearts, though fear and sorrow and stubbornness may cloud our way. We may in fact have to stop and get our bearings ... but know that He is there waiting to guide our way. His cross is our guide, and especially in our inner and outer turmoil.

May the people of Joplin ... and all of us ... be guided, through our darkest nights, to Him who gives us the peace we need in times of both trouble and joy. I pray every day for the people of Joplin. 

Life and Death in Joplin

Seen in an article on Time.com, about the tornado in Joplin … “There was a lot of talk the day before the storm about whether the world would end. An old preacher in California had declared that time was running out and bought ads in major newspapers and on billboards to spread the news. The Joplin storm was a summons back to reality, a reminder that a world can end at any moment even as new worlds begin. Five patients died when the storm hit St. John's hospital; the same day, four babies were born at Freeman hospital across the street.”

Those are the essential truths of life and death, indeed. A world can end at any moment, a death can end a life. And a new life can begin at any moment, and does every single day around the world.

We have over 300 members on our company in Joplin and surrounding areas, and I have gotten constant updates on Facebook about the status of our friends. Many have lost their homes, some have lost loved ones. Some are still searching for family members and friends. Surely it is a cauldron of emotion every day for each of our friends … and that feeling will not dissipate very easily. We have been praying for them for days and will continue. The Joplin disaster is almost unbelievable, the destruction is hard to look at and the more I read, the more horrific I see it was to live through. Still is.

And too … it is a parallel for our own life and death. We live mostly secure of our future but Joplin reminds us that we may not truly know that future … God’s plan for us may take sad and unexpected twists and turns. We will be humbled at times, but the courage I have heard about and read about is amazing as well, showing that even the depth of despair does not always overwhelm inborn strength and faith. Death came to many, that also unexpected and sad, because God’s plan can be harsh … but on the same day, there was new life to celebrate, and joy in the hearts of the living.

Joplin teaches me about life and death … I see that more clearly now, in every story of anguish and every story of hope. In all of those stories, still there is God reaching out to His people, the living and the dead … and helping new worlds begin for us all. My heart is in Joplin and will be for some time.

A Time to Listen

Shared by Marty O'Donnell, from Today God is First ... "Many people live a very planned and orchestrated life where they know almost everything that will happen. But for people in whom God is performing a deeper work, He brings them into a time of quietness that seems almost eerie. They cannot see what God is doing. They just know that He is doing a work that cannot be explained to themselves or to others.

During these times, God is calling us aside to fashion something new in us. It is a place of nothingness designed to call us to deeper roots of prayer and faith. It is not a comfortable place, especially for a task-driven workplace believer. Our nature cries out, "You must do something" while God is saying, "Be still and know that I am God."

I have always been that workaholic, that task-driven person that cannot sit still. Always doing, to a fault. Living a life of corporate climbing, with not enough time given to my family, much less to myself. But as Marty correctly pointed out, my move to Orlando has given me an unexpected gift: the opportunity to listen to God, to prepare myself, to grow my faith and even my legacy.

I do not know exactly what God's plan is, as I live a very different life in Orlando, a bit more alone than I expected but happier too than I expected. Sharing more with others. Writing more. Thinking more. And certainly taking the time to listen, based on a life more filled with prayer than with a rush of activity. It has taken some time to find a new center and I certainly haven't done it alone ... I see my Why Catholic group and my Emmaus experience as major factors. Those too have been part of God's plan, unexpected blessings as they were.

I've learned the biggest lesson of my life ... to trust that plan. To listen to Him. To be the gift I know I can be, however I can be. Thank you, Marty, for the reminder that it is good to be still and know that He is God and that He will guide me without fail.